Sideways

...Losing Myself

thoughts, dangerous thoughts,
thoughts so vile that they stray away from the conventional thinking of MY mind
a place, which once only allowed thoughts that passed a certain standard
now i stumble as i see that a new regime has taken over this space
Occupied. now not mine, my mind hides in the dark confines
This is sad because I've never ever felt more unlike me.
more outside, behind, scarce more never there
its like I'm being operated, by someone with a cold empty stare
and my hands are moving, my smile still gleams,
but it lacks the reality of who I am.
and these sparks of mind silence, thoughts as they're called, are slowly but surely turning me into someone else,
and that's scary, because I liked who I was,
and now i cant find that person, so that person is at a loss,
what attracted people to me is now no more, so will i now lose friends as I've lost my personality?
hmmm makes you think right.
All i know is that I want to get back in my skin, figuratively
Cuz i'm not there right now.


"Sideways" - Citizen Cope